


Surprisingly, Not Insanity

by space_trashlord



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst to come, Canon Divergent, F/F, F/M, Fuckbaggery, General Confusion and Fun, M/M, Mental Conversations, Multi, Pre/During/Post TFA, Tall and scary dangerous guy has a massive crush and is pathetic, The fun is going to go away soon, The plot grew hands and started writing this for me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-09
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-14 01:06:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7145819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_trashlord/pseuds/space_trashlord
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When you start hearing voices in your head, normal protocol would be to be slightly worried about your sanity.</p><p>Or you know, maybe a telepath is talking to you and ruining your chances of getting laid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Insanity, or telepathy?

**Author's Note:**

> This prompt was submitted on my tumblr, and I was weak and had to do it. http://space-trashlord.tumblr.com/post/145655977496/klyo-secretly-has-a-crush-on-reader-and-to-get-to
> 
> Don't worry about the other fics, they're just on a short hiatus until exams, and when I catch up to my writing ahead of what I want to submit.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: THE ITALICS AND BOLD DIDN'T TRANSFER OVER, DAMMIT. I FIXED IT NOW.

Mentally cursing the giant tantrum of a man who caused all the work, Y/N set to repairing _yet again_ , a poor, innocent little panel in a meeting room. For the third time in as many days, Kylo Ren’s hissy fits had caused destruction throughout the base. While she was glad that no one was on the receiving end, she’d have prefered it if Ren could _calm the fuck down_.

At least until she could finally have that date with Dopheld.

The repairs were a pain, the deep gouges and burns into the metal forcing it to need replacing, and the wires to be ripped out entirely and replaced.

_Does he have some sort of hatred for calcinators? It seems like he hit nothing vital except for those._

Y/N sighed, informing Dopheld that perhaps dinner was not possible tonight, thanks to Ren, and her supervisor, that 8 of the 12 calcinators in the room were entirely to be written off and replaced. The other 4 could be repaired, but were probably best to be stripped too.

Messages sent, and another heaving sigh, she set to work.

\---------------------------------

Repairing TIE Fighters was difficult work when your assistant, a trembling, useless excuse for a Storm Trooper, couldn’t even hand you the correct wrench.

“No- No, the- No, not that one! The big one that looks like- Yes, thank fuck, you’re learning!” Y/N huffed, pulling the wrench from the gloved hands, twisting another bolt into place. “If you don’t screw it on tight, when you weld it, there will be air trapped under the molten metal, which will stay sealed in there, and if the metal breaks for some reason, you are no longer in an airtight TIE Fighter.”

Y/N jumped down from the ladder, grabbing the welder.

“Do you know what happens then?”

The Trooper shook his head.

“Fuck’s sake, do they teach you to be stupid or something? You die. Horribly. You don’t feel it because it’s so quick you don’t even realise you die, but you die. The pressure in your body and the capsule is greater than that in space, so it leaves via the hole to try and stabilise out there. If you’re lucky, it takes out your internal pressure, and you basically explode. If you’re unlucky, you get sucked on to the hole, which due to pressure will cause you to literally be squeezed through it. That would probably hurt.”

Firing up the welder, Y/N sealed the bolt against the TIE Fighter, enclosing the capsule again.

“Now, we put on the hull plating, and then weld that on, and it should be good to go.”  
“Th-thank you, ma’am.” The Trooper stuttered.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

LE-37 raced off to his patrol, avoiding all eye contact and pretending not to hear Y/N call after him.

He remembered what Lord Ren did to the Trooper who dared speak back to her.

He’d rather try to fight the vacuum of space trying to de-pressurise him.

\-------------------------------

_What the flipping fuck is this shit?_

This shit, being the slop they served out in the eating area.

_  
**I know, right?**_

Y/N stopped, the unknown voice causing her to freeze and look around frantically.

_  
**…**_

The voice sounded like it was debating what to say.

_What in the hell? Umm, hi?_

The voice seemed to freeze, confusion leaking into Y/N’s brain.

**_  
You are strangely okay with this._ **

 

_I work in the First Order. My highest superiors are two giant man-babies who can’t help but measure their dicks all day. I work with idiots, and apparently one of said bosses is a magical fucking unicorn. I’ve finally lost it. Certifiably now._

 

The voice seemed to take offence to the unicorn comment, but sounded calm when it responded.

_  
**Who’s going to confirm your insanity?**_

 

_Duh, my alter ego of course._

 

The voice chuckled, tinkles of full blown laughter echoing in Y/N’s ears.

 

His voice was gorgeous.

 

The voice sounded irritated, another voice echoing faintly from him. He evidently didn’t like this voice.

 

Almost mournfully, it slowly retreated away, tendrils caressing Y/N’s mind before being gone suddenly.

 

Dopheld’s eyebrows just about reached his hairline when she suggested that she may have telepathy.

 

He made her swear to never, under any circumstances, tell anyone.

 

Especially Ren.  
\-------------------------------

**_You aren’t telepathic, I am._ **

 

_HOLY SHIT, YOU’RE LIKE A FUCKING RAINBOW ON TATOOINE! RARE AS SHIT!_

 

**_Please stop yelling. That hurts more than you think._ **

 

_Dude, I doubt that._

 

The voice seemed to hesitate, before mentally shrugging.

 

**_ARE YOU SO CERTAIN?_ **

 

Y/N found herself on her knees, gasping for air, mind on fire as she tried to stop her ears from ringing.

 

Apology and regret swarmed the other side of her mind, where the voice was coming from.

 

_**I’m sorry. I felt it would be best to show you, but didn’t intend to be so… Forceful. Excuse the pun.** _

 

_Dude, if you’re Force-sensitive, run. They hunt you people, try to kill you. I don’t know what they do if they don’t kill you, and I don’t want to know. But if Kylo R- if he-..._

 

_**I’ll be fine. Your concern is unnecessary. My presence is known on this ship, not unmonitored, but known.** _

 

_Still. Be careful. I’ve seen him angry before. I don’t think anyone wants to be on the receiving end of that._

 

The voice was silent.  
\-----------------------------------

_Sup, nerd. You there? Your Force still working?_

 

A snort. ** _You can’t turn Force-sensitivity off. Just like you can’t block thoughts entirely. I always hear the thoughts of others. Other Force-sensitives are just better at blocking theirs comparatively._**

 

_Cool. So like, have you ever used the Force just because you can?_

 

**_Any Force-sensitive who suggests otherwise is a liar._ **

 

_But like, for bad reasons. Like pulling someone’s pants down, or like, tripping someone?_

 

**_… No._ **

 

The voice couldn’t lie to you, the edges of a lopsided smirk gracing the muscles of her own face, flashes of the other’s eyes, mischievous and alight with glee.

 

_Liar._

 

The voice chuckled slightly, before returning to their duties.

\--------------------

_DWEEB, DO YOU KNOW WHERE DOPHELD MITAKA IS?_

 

**_Do not shout, and most importantly do not call me that. And no. The voice became vicious, like a growling wild animal. I do not know where he is. And before you ask, no I won’t go sensing him for you._ **

 

_Dude, I’ve known you for how long now?_

 

**_8 days._ **

 

_8 days. Dude. Bro. Buddy. Pal. You are close enough to me now for me to impart important information to you._

 

**_Please, do not-_ **

 

_I’m trying to date this cute guy-_

 

Mental groaning began to take place of physical words on his side of the conversation.

 

_And he wants to fuck me. I want to get some, okay. All I’ve really had was fingers from one guy, that felt like giant stabby needles, and this really sloppy eating out from this girl who I think was experimenting and didn’t like it at all._

 

Choked off whining noises, following by the echoes of a cough, as though Y/N could hear what he was hearing, came from him.

 

_Please, help me in my endeavour to get laid._

 

_**No.** _

 

The conversation suddenly shut, like a blast door slamming down.

 

She didn’t hear from him for a week, only getting vague sensations of anger, and then guilt.

 

Kylo Ren had rampages 8 different rooms in less than 2 hours. A record.

 

_FUCKING REN!_


	2. Telepathic Asshole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Y/N's telepathic friend is subjected to more mental torment. Why did he have to accidentally respond to her thoughts?

**_Ignoring me won't change the situation, I'll only become more annoying._ **

_You're a complete asshole, you know that?_

_**I try.**  
_

Y/N had managed to complete all of her work, fix any issues that had arisen, avoid General Hux's evil glare entirely,  _and_ score a surprise date with Dopheld.

Which went fantastic until Fuck Lord mentally contacted her again.

 ** _I thought you called Hux 'Fuck Lord'._** the voice was supremely amused.

Y/N had managed to figure out that the voice seemed to work frequently with Hux. And hated him.

The voice was also extraordinarily good at bitching.

_He's 'Fuck Boy', doubt he has enough sense to be considered an adult. And YOU, you little shit. You RUINED the date!_

**_The date was ruined by the man's incompetence. And I'm taller than you, so not little._ **

_Fucking- Don't even try it! And it was fine till you started screaming at me mentally._

Said mental screaming had consisted of nonsense, garbled languages and miscellaneous voices, what had to be the minds of everyone on the ship pushed into her own at once, and then turned on full volume.

The migraine was instantaneous, and has Mitaka worried you were going to pass out.

 ** _I said it was an accident. You wouldn't understand the Force._** the voice became dismissive, a mental hand wave brushed in her direction. There was a small amount of guilt underlying the thought, but also, a secret feeling of satisfaction. The asshole.

Y/N growled, and aggressively shut off communication.

_Yeah, bitch. I figured out how to do it. Two way fucking street._

_\------_

**_Rude._ **

_Mother FUCKER._

The hammer in her hand went flying, clanging to the ground as Y/N clutched her heart in fright. The piece of shit gave no warning he was about to speak, no normal mental knock or the increasingly familiar sound of mental buzzing.

The voice chuckled.

**_I'm rather powerful, Y/N._ **

_No shi- Hang on I literally just realised I have no actual name to attribute to you. Just Fuck Lord. And Fuckstain. And basically any insult I've called you thus far._

**_I looked up 'douche_ _cannoe'._** He suddenly said.  _ **That's a very strange insult.**_

_Did you look up what-_

She felt his grimace and a strange shudder run down her spin. Yup, he looked it up.

**_So... You managed to block me out. Impressive._ **

_Yeah, well, you obviously got back in. So I guess that didn't work._

**_You stopped trying. Normally I'd force my way in, but I thought you'd be open to converse again sometime soon. Five days is an impressive shield for someone without-... How was your other date?_ **

The change in topic came with the sensation of tar on the mind.

_You okay there? Your thoughts feel... Slow? And you don't even care about the dates. In fact, you hate them. I'm going to equate it to the fact that you likely haven't been laid ever, and as your friend I have to suffer with you, but still._

He spluttered, indignation filling her mind. 

**_Excuse you! I was- I- Being nice. I was being nice._ **

Lies. Again.

_I can't believe you. You lie to me so often. I thought we were bros._

He groaned.

\-----------------

_So what exactly is it like?_

**_It's 2am, why would you do this?_ **

He felt exhausted, like he'd been running four marathons simultaneously.

_Answer the question. I can't sleep and I'm interested._

**_What is what like?_ **

_A question for the ages. And you know what I mean._

Genuine confusion radiated towards her, before settling into the exhaustion again.

**_No I don't. Now please go to sleep._ **

_The Force, obviously. You're the one who has it._

Y/N felt more than heard the sigh.

_**I don't know, I've always had it. How do you explain colour to something that cannot see?** _

_Well explain your experience of it, I guess._

_**I don't know!**_ He floundered for an explanation, some sort of words to even begin.  ** _It's like, like being able to feel everything. To be able to feel it with your mind. That's why I can speak to you, I could theoretically speak to anyone, no matter the distance. I can influence the Force, and as a result influence reality. I choose to make things happen._**

**_I chose to speak to you, because I could hear you. You were projecting your thoughts. Now that I look at it, I think I've heard you for a very long time. I can't block it out when it's being pushed at me, which is why I can't block you out._ **

_So it feels like you can communicate with everything?_

**_Yes, and no. You can't communicate with inanimate things. But you can move them. And I guess living things too, but it's more difficult when it's alive. When it's alive, it influences the Force. Everything, no matter how little it is attributed to it, influences the Force in some way. To do something to them means to influence the Force in an opposing way, or along with them. For instance, talking to you is using your own influence. If I was to try and pick you up, I'd have to go against you. You naturally respond to gravity, so I take that away, overpower it, and I can lift you with the Force._ **

He sounded more awake now, like he was truly trying to concentrate to explain everything.

He sounded almost excited.

**_It's so difficult to explain what I know and understand instinctively. It's like trying to tell you why I think the way I do. I just... Do. But the Force is also infinitely more complex than that. It just is, and in the end, we all return to it and are bound to its will. Whether we like it or not._ **

_That sounds so..._

**_Ominous?_ **

_No. Beautiful. The Force, as scary as it is, is beautiful._

His mental gasp seemed to take her breath away, as though he stole all the air from around her.

His mind filled with a sensation she couldn't put to words, but appreciation was definitely one of them.

_**Interesting. You're very strange, Y/N. Good night.** _

His final words lulled her to sleep, his influence through the Force pushing her eyes closed and her mind into slumber.

She dreamt of fields, of birds, animals, trees, flowers, life, flowing.

And imagined that this is what the Force would look like if it was a physical thing.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Readerchan seems to have figured out that he's an asshole, who enjoys ruining her dates because he's never had any. That isn't the case, but she'll see why soon enough. And of course soon enough things will go down. I initially had like no plot for this, but now I have a bit of a plan, and I have to tell you. This is going to hurt.
> 
> Anyway, so The Voice has explained his experience of the Force to Readerchan, and she's managed to see the Force from his perspective, to a point. The Voice's respect has started to go up even more for our lil munchkin.
> 
> Next chapter is going to be a bit more cute dialogue and everything before we really get started.
> 
> When we finally meet Kylo, shit is going to go down.
> 
> I am so excited.
> 
> Get ready.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is gonna be a series of relatively short chapters (I say this now, but they'll likely grow into whatever the fuck they want, and suddenly it'll be 100k word count, ugh) that create a story type thing based on the prompt.
> 
> We started with the protagonist, the antagonist, the creepy voice, and the beloved Dopheld Mitaka. Yaaay!


End file.
